Goodbye Ordinary

Day 16: Appreciating what you have

Posted on: April 16, 2012

The thing that I love most about yoga is that it isn’t just about the physical. I am not an athlete, and I usually despise exercising, with a few exceptions like dancing. Most of all, I can’t stand competition. Okay that’s not true… I can’t stand LOSING. I would rather not participate than fail. I don’t have to be the best… But I can’t fail. I may have some issues.

But yoga doesn’t seem like “exercise” to me. It’s emotional and introspective. It is one situation that I actually like being quiet. For an hour. Amazing, I know, ItISpossible for me… I was shocked too.

Sometimes talking so much is really just me avoiding what is going on in my own head. I think a lot… Usually that means words are coming out of my mouth as soon as I think them. But quiet time at yoga allows me to actually think full thoughts and consider how I feel about what I’m thinking… and just in general how I feel about life.

I live in constant chaos. My kids are wildly energetic. Amazing, but always on high speed. Work is full of the hustle and bustle of a company with 400ish employees. There is usually something going on, lots of it that is full of drama. Even when it’s quiet (which is rare) there is something to read, something to ponder. I don’t get much time where I can just think about the thoughts I want or need to think about. The hard stuff. The good stuff. The important stuff. I am just too busy thinking about everything else.

But for that hour at yoga, I can let my mind go to all those things that I can’t during the rest of my day. I can allow the world to stop its entrance into my mind for an hour and I can focus on me. ME,me, ME,me, meeee!

This is me, happy.

Today we did pigeon and while we held the pose (in it’s small variants, like folding forward) I just smiled. I was thinking about the place where I’m at in my life right now. I’m graduating college in less than a month. I have two amazing kids that surprise me every day. Little Miss was saying “lima beeeean” when I got home and ate dinner (which had lima beans) and it was so cute. She’s also figured out how to play the matching card memory game on the ipod/ipad. She’s growing up so fast and getting so smart! Then there is the monster. He’s riding a 2 wheeler now. He’s learning how to recognize and reign in his emotions (he’s spirited and it’s been tough figuring out what works for us). He’s being such a great helper with grama in the garden, and with his sister. I love my kids. I also am in a really great place with the boyfriend. We’ve had some rough patches, but it just makes us stronger and we are really, really happy right now.

Now if only things could get pinned down with a job after graduation, and if only I could win the lotto… Then I’d be so set.

With grama’s help, Little Miss is asleep in her own bed (for now). So I better get to sleep while I can.




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